The Illusion of Control
How to focus your energy during change and disruption.
Lynn Harris
(5-minute read)
We like to fool ourselves into thinking we have more control over our lives than we do. Our brains don’t like uncertainty, so the illusion of control can be comforting. However, when faced with the reality of how little control we really have, particularly in important areas of our lives, we can get frustrated and disillusioned. Although we have less control than we would like, we do have some agency and influence if we shift our mindset and focus our energy. This is what Andrew discovered in one of our leadership programs.
Andrew is a high-performing leader in a multinational organization. He took his current role because his personal values align with his company's values and because he was given a lot of autonomy to run his part of the business. However, when I met him during a leadership program, he was dejected and pessimistic. He spent much of our first meeting blaming others. With the appointment of a new CEO, more strategies and decisions were centralized, and there was far less focus on the organizational values that attracted Andrew and his team to join the organization. He was becoming increasingly disengaged and saw himself as a victim of the new system.
During the leadership program, we helped Andrew step back and observe his mindset and behavior. With support and challenge from his coach and colleagues, he accepted the reality of his new situation, identified areas where he had more influence than he had initially thought, and made some clear choices about what he wanted and what he would do. His circumstances hadn’t changed, but his mindset had. He left the program considerably more optimistic and energized than when he arrived.
A concept that enabled Andrew to shift his mindset was the circles of control, influence, and concern.
When Andrew worked with this model, he realized that much of his angst and energy was focused on the circle of concern. He didn’t like or agree with many of his organization’s changes, but he had no power to control them. He was a little shocked to realize he was behaving like a victim and wasting his energy in areas over which he had no control. He was stuck in blaming others and was not showing up for his team as the leader he wanted to be.
Once he grounded himself in the reality that he had no control over his organization's new strategic direction, he shifted his attention to where he had some choice and agency. He started to explore the circles of influence and control. In the circle of control, he realized he had control over how he responded to his new situation. For example, he could choose to leave or stay in his job (he chose to stay). In the circle of influence, he saw that he could influence how change was implemented in his area of the business. This shift in focus and attitude enabled him to move from a victim mindset to a choice mindset.
Using the Circles of Control Model helps to ground yourself in a reality of where you have control, where you might have influence, and where you have concerns but no control. This lets you identify where you have agency and choice and guides your focus and energy. This simple model is particularly useful when you suspect you may, like Andrew, be stuck in the circle of concern operating from a victim mindset.
How to use the model
Think of a situation that is troubling you or where you feel stuck.
Circle of concern:
List everything you are worried about in this situation. Acknowledge any fears, uncertainties, or potential outcomes that you find troubling.
Ask yourself, “Do I have any control over these issues?”
Circle of Influence:
Look at your list and determine where you have no control and where you might be able to influence. By identifying what you can influence, you can focus your energy on areas where you can have a meaningful impact.
For each item, ask yourself:
“Can I take action to change or potentially influence this?”
“Do I have resources or support that can help me to influence?”
Circle of control:
Identify what you can control in the situation. This includes your thoughts, actions, responses and mindset. Ask yourself:
How do I choose to respond to these circumstances?
What choices can I make to positively impact this situation?
Make Your Choices:
Understand your concerns, what you can and can’t control, and what you can influence, then choose where to invest your time and energy.
You will likely feel more confident because you are acting within your capacity and not worrying about factors outside your control.
Letting go of the illusion of control isn’t always easy. This thought process helps you stop wasting your mental resources worrying about matters outside your sphere of control. Think of it as liberating significant sources of wasted attention and redirecting your focus to where it can create a positive impact. Imagine what might be possible if you experiment with the three-circles model and concentrate on what you can, in reality, control and influence. Like Andrew, you may become considerably more optimistic, energized and effective.
If you would like to learn more about a Choice Mindset, see my previous article.
Lynn Harris is a founding Partner at Leadership Mindset Partners.